Reply to Is it unethical/immoral/unChristian to leave my relationship?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]If you get divorced, you’ll still be on the hook for the financial stuff.  Your creditors don’t care which one of you ran up the bills.  You also may be hit with alimony.  Unless there is abuse or infidelity, I would start with counseling first, OP.  It has nothing to do with religion or morality.  (I’m a minister.  Definitely not anti-religion.). It’s about making good financial decisions. [/quote]

No alimony.  I fully understand all the rest of the financial fallout is on me.  I basically let her deal with finances alone for a few years and I should have excised some oversight.  Heath/life/job got my attention instead. I did ask from time to time to put the brakes on spending but it was pooh-poohed or I was otherwise assured everything was OK.  Obviously my judgement is failing (part of my cognitive problems).

Abuse...arguable.  I have been losing my mind over the debt for a long time and she has berated me over it, telling me I didn't understand it, we'd manage, I was stupid, etc.  She's also very controlling...increasingly so - and I wonder if it's because she senses my panic.  She doesn't even let me see the mail or handle the bills because of the stress it creates.   OTOH she can be like Florence Nightengale in terms of caring for me.

It's so odd and I feel like God is challenging me with an impossible puzzle.  How do I promise to stay with someone who is unconsciously destroying my (and ultimately our) existence? [/quote]

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