Reply to My spouse doesn’t desire to understand me.

Forum Index » Relationship Discussion (non-explicit)

Reply to "My spouse doesn’t desire to understand me. "

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Man here, my wife says the same thing about me, although not so much the disrespect part but more that I don't listen and don't understand her on a deep level.  That I am too superficial and wouldn't care if she left.  It's heartbreaking to hear, it's not true of course but it puts a huge hole in our relationship and our intimate life is horrible and has been for years.  I check a lot of boxes on paper for sure, but if she doesn't feel loved it's hard to turn that around.

My recommendation is to try therapy before it's too late which it probably is for us although we are trying to stay together for the kids.[/quote]

One other thought - someone wrote a very good reply in another thread about blaming a spouse for being unhappy.  Could that be your situation?  My wife is very unhappy where she is professionally and doesn't have a lot of friends and I do think she takes her position out on me.[/quote]
NP... IMO, I think it's a bit of both.  Yes, some people are unhappy with their own lives, and they take it out on their spouse and/or kids, but sometimes, the spouse is part of the reason why they are unhappy.  Also, sometimes, the spouse really does dismiss the feelings and thoughts of the other spouse. This is the "I'm always right" spouse.

Often, a wife just wants the husband to listen and acknowledge her feelings rather than solve the problem or place blame.

In another thread about "what men want", some man stated that he wanted his wife to be nurturing, and I asked if he was nurturing to his spouse, and he said he was.  Obviously, I take that at face value since this is an anonymous forum, but I would ask you.. "are you nurturing to your spouse"?   When she shares her feelings with you do you dismiss them or do you actually listen and try to nurture her?[/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics