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[quote=MayaJ]I am really struggling with a decision of 2 versus 3 kids. We have 2 daughters, ages 6.5 and 3, and lately I feel broody. What brought this about was an unplanned pregnancy last year (BC failed!) that ended up in a miscarriage. DH and I panicked because it had never been our plan to have more than 2 children, and I almost booked a termination, but then I started coming to terms with the idea of a 3rd child. Two weeks later, I miscarried and immediately felt sadness.

What gives me pause is that we are both 41, although women in my family are very fertile and go through menopause late so I am not as worried about my ability to conceive - both our kids were conceived on the first try.  
I like that our life is now manageable and pleasant, our kids are easy, well behaved and good sleepers. We love to travel internationally and have been waiting for the younger one to grow up a little more so we can start doing more adventurous travel. 
At the same time, I can't help but feel wistful when I see families with 3 kids, of which there are a lot in our circle of friends. We come from small families, and so our kids will only have each other, and we'll only have them when we grow old.

If you thought about a 3rd, but ultimately didn't go for it, do you regret it now? We can afford another except we'll be tight on space in our apartment, but we'll manage. I am not sure I'll have the energy to parent 3 kids in my 40s and 50s. I am also worried about a special needs child. I am pro-choice and will likely terminate a trisomy pregnancy because of the impact a SN child would have on our existing kids and because of our age (no judging please), but obviously there are many other health issues and risks that keep me up at night.

Thank you.

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