Reply to Is there a pampered adult child in your family who the parents dote on?

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[quote=Anonymous]I think it’s oven the parent’s doing, and unfortunately, it’s the sibling that everyone takes it out on. I know of a few of those cases (one of them in my own family), and I’m sorry, but that kid has *always* been treated differently, for myriad of reasons. Often, their main relationship with their parents is based on their learned helplessness, so it’s a double edged sword.

If the child has never learned proper coping skills, then they never learn to have those skills as an adult. The fact that your parents enable is on them, not on the sibling.

Each family seems to have its own reasons for that child being coddled. In my family, sibling was unexpected, premature, and had a dramatic entrance into the world. They never had any medical or psychosocial issues after that, but were always “special”. For my dear friend it was the opposite - she had a disability, and was always pushed to “be better”. In doing that, they didn’t help her brother become independent. In another family I know, it’s the firstborn son, and in another, it’s the long awaited daughter. [/quote]

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