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[quote=Anonymous]I used donor sperm and while I thought adult photos would be really important to me, I ended up going with a bank that didn't provide them.

I found as I went through the search process, that I actually didn't want to know or see this person as an adult. I wanted my child to be his or her own person in my mind without constantly thinking back to the donor's adult photos. It's almost as if seeing the adult photos would make this person bigger in the process than they are. I'm incredibly grateful to the donor, but he's also just a part of what makes up my child.

What I did find helpful is a donor that had late elementary or middle school photos. Baby photos just don't tell you much. Also, looking at the donor's family history and descriptions of sibling, grandparents, aunts, uncles, etc. I have a lot of siblings myself and among us we have multiple hair and eye colors and wildly different personalities. In some ways, you are choosing a family full of DNA, not a single donor.

Like a PP, I opted for someone who didn't look exactly like me, but looked like he belonged in my family. His middle school photos reminded me of my brother. And his family had similar coloring, height and ancestry to my family.[/quote]

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