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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I can say something innocuous, and he'll take it as if I'm judging him. I find it hard to even state my preferences now, because I know I'm going to get a defensive reply (And I mean something like "Hey would you mind running the dishwasher on gentle?" or "I really like this brand of rice better than that brand of rice"

He does the same with our kids. Especially when they ask him to do something "Please don't touch me" and then he'll get defensive and try to explain why it's ok that he touched our child on the arm at that time (Nothing inappropriate, just hormonal teen girls, who I completely support in their request to not be touched).

What do I do?[/quote]

Lots of "innocuous" comments add up over time. Why is this so hard to understand?

It's a control thing, pure and simple. Micromanagement. My wife is like this. There's one right way to do everything, and that's [i]her[/i] way. Yes, dear. Of course, dear. Right. Okay. Sure. Yes, right away.

And you have a preferred dishwasher cycle? Really? Your poor DH. Keep it up, though. You'll break him eventually, and then everything will be just as it should.[/quote]

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