Reply to 17 Yr Not Asking Permission To Go Somewhere After School

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]That sounds very controlling. It would be reasonable to have him let you now if he wont' be home for dinner or if you need hi home but needing to know where he is what he is doing and who he is with all the time is about control.

You are preparing them for their next relationships. If they have never had control of themselves - you have 100% control then they are fare more likely to get into relationships where someone else controls them and wants to know where they are, who they are with and what they are doing all the time.

He is 17 and you have one year until he is gone to college. Figure out how to be okay without 100% control. Figure out what you need to do in terms of him being respectful of the family.[/quote]

He is a 17 year old, get over yourself.  [/quote]

Yes he is 17. He is less than a year away from being a legal adult. He should be moving towards that independence. Part of which is not needing to report every movement or where he is or who he is with or what he is doing. As I said, it is reasonable to have expectations about being home by a certain time or letting someone know his general whereabouts but not the needing to check in about every movement, every person, every activity. That is controlling.

Many 17 year olds are already at college. Teaching them the skills to manage and regulate themselves is part of preparing someone for adulthood.[/quote]

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