Reply to Accepting that some people accept being treated badly

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[quote=Anonymous]
I've seen this dynamic so many times: all you see is your parents suffering, because they're venting to you and letting you see the negative side of their actions. What your siblings see are loving grandparents willing to help out. I'm sure your siblings are grateful and thank their parents, but perhaps not in your hearing or not enough to your liking. And when people interact closely like this, obviously there's going to be friction. Your parents are getting SOMETHING out of that relationship! They are getting the joy of caring for their grandchildren, and the satisfaction of being needed and "mattering".

They are also getting SOMETHING out of their relationship with you: your help, your crusading on their behalf, and the satisfaction of "mattering", again.

The conclusions are:

There is nothing worth doing that isn't hard work. They have chosen to do this hard work, and have chosen you to vent to when they're fatigued. That's a little manipulative of them. However, soon enough they won't have the energy to help out and the situation will resolve by itself. I suggest you don't wage war on your siblings. This is on your parents, and after they've gone, you still have to get along with your siblings. Perhaps by then you'll have kids too, and your perspective will change a little bit.

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