Reply to separation/divorce/coparenting when one spouse travels a lot for work

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Reply to "separation/divorce/coparenting when one spouse travels a lot for work"

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]No, 50/50 isn’t the standard.  Some people want it to be the standard but it simply isn’t true. Out of my circle of friends who didn’t pre-agree on their custody arrangement, the mother wound up with more for reasons like husband travels a lot. Kids need stability and going back and forth is very difficult —add to that a traveling parent, it’s a mess. Why should OP get 50/50 and constantly have to cover for her traveling ex? Why? Just so he can pay less support? Or so the kids can never know their actual schedule?
OP-don’t accept that 50/50 is the standard.[/quote]

Whether 50/50 is the default really depends on the state where you live. If a lawyer told OP that it's likely to be 50/50, I would consider that reliable. I live in a state that still prefers to have a primary parent.

My ex travels for a week every 6 weeks and we do 50/50. It works okay. She usually leaves on Sunday and comes back on a redeye on Friday. When means I cover 3 additional nights. We do a monthly schedule and sometimes we rebalance to make up for those travel days, other times I just take the extra days. That means that I might have 55% of time in a given year, but honestly it's little enough that I really don't need the courts to acknowledge that. I think it's completely reasonable to ask your ex to pay for any additional care you need during travel time, and to also have him be the lead in making those arrangements.

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