Reply to “I pushed him back” - talking about self defense

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Not sure what I should have said to DD - age 4.

“Larlo pushed me and pushed my friends...” 
“What did you do?”
“I pushed him back - hard!”

On one hand I am like “you go girl!” On the other hand, I’m sure there is a more appropriate pre-school response.  I mean “go tell a grownup” in reality isn’t the most effective response. Then you never learn to stand up. I did talk about “this is my body and I said no.”

How do you talk about self defense vs aggressive behavior? [/quote]

We had always taught DS the "go talk to an adult' "tell them no and remove yourself from the situation".  Which served him just fine until 2 incidents.

1.  He was 6 and  on the bus another 6 year old punched him in the eye and gave him a black eye.  He was worried about moving away because the bus was in motion and it was against the rules to move.  Kid then punched him again in the stomach before the bus stopped and DS could tell the bus driver.  DH and many of my mom friends said we should tell DS to punch back if it happened again.  Thankfully the kid was removed

2. Another time DS was 6 and 2 kids were messing with him at a sports practice.  He did everything we told him to do (told the coach, removed himself from the situation several times). It continued quietly and DS even got spoken to by the coach about staying in his spot and not moving around.  DS finally just pushed the kid away.  I spoke to the coach about the situation and then bought DS an ice cream as a reward. [/quote]

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