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[quote=Anonymous]I was wondering if someone could give me some advice on how to become a less anxious mom, as the worrying is making me exhausted. A bit of background. I have two girls 20 months apart. My eldest is 4 and a half and my youngest is almost 3. 
My eldest was born with a congenital defect that made it difficult for her to breathe and eat and needed surgery to correct the defect at 2.5 months. The time leading up to the surgery was difficult to say the least because I had to watch her every breath to make sure she was breathing. She continued having some breathing issues related to the sect until she was around 1 and now is doing well. My second had severe reflux as a baby - we tried both zantac and omerprazole and in the end we’re able to get it under control with a high dose of both when she was 5 months. Leading up to that time she would be crying 24/7 and would sometimes refuse to drink milk. I think I suffered from post party anxiety with both girls... With my first the anxiety hit AFTER the surgery and when she had gotten better. My OB said it was probably post traumatic stress disorder saying that looking after my daughter pre surgery was so difficult that I didn’t have time to process my feelings. When she finally got better I went from survival mode to finally focusing on how I had felt over the entire thing. My anxiety subsided at around 6 moms post partum with both kids just as they started to sleep through the night.

Fast forward to today. I have to amazing girls. They are a delight and are enjoying preschool. People always come to me for advice. They seem to think I’ve got it together and always are amazed at how calm I am and how relaxed I am around my kids. I find this funny since internally I am still an anxious parent: I just am able to project calm. But those who know me really well such as my sister, husband and best friend know how anxious I can get. For example my eldest has chronic constipation and although it is a manageable problem and we have a great GI it causes me anxiety and I am worried that she will be dealing with this forever. The clean outs we have to go through stress me out and so does managing the clean outs. She also has asthma and needs glasses but for some reason those issues (maybe cuz I can control them more?) don’t stress me out as much. Youngest has constipation issues as well though not as bad as the eldest. Overall they are doing well and according to my eldest’s  GI her problems are manageable and will improve with treatment. They are happy loving girls. They are surrounded by family, have friends, love playing and running and doing the things that kids their age love doing. I’m not sure why I can’t just deal with their health problems as health problems and look at the big picture. My brain tells me to do that but it’s hard to change how I’m feeling. I have been trying to focus on myself: I'm seeing a physical therapist for my post partum back issues. I’m working out. Just got a haircut :) Trying to read more fiction (I love reading in general and it calms me). Anyways I just wanted to see if anyone has any advice for me. These are first world problems definitely and I do realize how lucky I am. [/quote]

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