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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]She lives out of state. Otherwise I would have punted long ago.  After years of not so subtle belittling, age has done away with all inhibitions. Her mother was just diagnosed with lung cancer and I mentioned there were immunotherapy trials and some in practice. I got back a tirade of nastiness, snark and personal insults about how stupid and thoughtless I am. I essentially told her to f off

Done. Feels good

[/quote]

Since it "feels good" you may not really consider my point but I'm going to try to make it anyway, just in case.  When someone is in crisis mode they react from that place.  They often aren't rational or civil.  If the person means something to you, you let it slide--because of the crisis.  I have a friend who is going through a hellish divorce right now.  I'm her "safe place."  I put myself there when she first told me what was going on because I've been there myself and I get it.  She's not abusive, that's different, but she is snippy and sometimes over the top in conversation.  I let it slide.  She often apologizes and I tell her it's fine and I MEAN IT.  You can be a real gift to this friend if you have it in you.  You might be surprised how good it feels to be that person for someone.  Just my .02[/quote]

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