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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]How old are the kids and the ILs?  That's important.

I saw a set of grandparents out with their 3 grandkids this weekend that were definitely too much for them.  The youngest, maybe 3, took off running in the parking lot and if the older sibling, maybe 7-9, hadn't been able to run after him, he'd have definitely gotten hit by a car as he was heading towards the exit area where traffic is much busier.  The grandma could do nothing but shriek and the grandpa couldn't run very fast.  I'd say they were probably in their mid to late 60s.

My ILs had zero desire to spend too much solo time with mine until they were in 1st grade.  Then they were more open to the kid spending the night or going on day trips with them.  I don't think it's hurt their relationship with the kids at all.  I just had to respect that they'd raised their kids and had no desire to deal with little kids in their 50s.   [/quote]

Ugh. This is why, despite my inlaws' pleas, I refused to let them have my son at their house overnight until he was 4 and had settled down enough to listen (he was a major handful before 4). They are lovely people but they can't run after a child. Also why they haven't had my 2 year old overnight yet -- I am fine with them watching her at our house but I can see the toll it takes on them. MIL actually injured herself taking care of DS when he was a baby (lifted him onto changing pad wrong) so I am protecting them from themselves to some extent, but so be it.

My parents definitely can't run after a child and also would be exhausted even caring for an older child. They have never asked to have the kids and I haven't offered.[/quote]

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