Reply to Being the spouse of an educator

Forum Index » Relationship Discussion (non-explicit)

Reply to "Being the spouse of an educator"

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP here. DH is an admin, but it’s a small school so he occasionally subs if no one else is available. He started at the school as a teacher (at $60K/yr) and became an admin after a few years there. This means his hourly pay rate is less than when he was a FT teacher. He thinks, wrongly IMHO, that it’s “an honor” to have his position, but he’s been in this admin role for a few years with no raises and more duties than ever. Saturday detention isn’t every week; staff at the school rotate the duty.

I think he loves his job. I don’t love my job one bit, and have a much longer commute than he does, which breeds more resentment on my part because I feel like I am the primary breadwinner and default parent so that he can have his “passion” job plus spend hours playing sports with kids that aren’t his.

I’ve bugged him a few times about trying to find a more flexible position, or a better paid one, but he’s not motivated to do so.

You’re right that this can be true for all couples. It seems, though, that education is a particularly inflexible and poorly paid field that requires sacrifice on a family’s part. I guess the sacrifice is for some sort of greater good, but god I’m tired. And sad that he chooses his job over us. [/quote]

OP, stop conflating issues. You keep coming back to this problem being related to education. It’s really about your last paragraph. He’s putting his family second. You feel dismissed. You feel like second string. It doesn’t matter whether you love your job or have a 5 minute commute. He’s not available, and he’s continuing to disregard your requests. Again, it’s time for a serious sit down. [/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics