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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Long story short: My husband is verbally and emotionally abusive and has threatened physical violence. I've been trying to make it work because we have 2 small kids.

I've been waking up every time with our baby (now 10 months). Sunday night, i was up with him 5 times and was exhausted (I WOH). So the following morning (yesterday) I told my husband I needed help and that I expected him to feed the baby a bottle overnight. He's never fed the baby. He didn't say anything to that.

I asked him to do this once previously, about a month ago when I was very sick, and he threatened violence. I told him that was unacceptable but... he still didn't feed the baby. I was too sick to fight with him over it. I fed the baby.

Last night I left the formula and a bottle on the counter and I left the monitor on next to his bed (I sleep in a room with the baby, he sleeps downstairs so the baby doesn't bother him). I texted him that I was going to sleep and I thanked him in advance for helping me get a better night's sleep.

He turned off the monitor and went to sleep.

When the baby woke up, I brought him downstairs, woke up my husband and put the baby on the bed with him. I told him the baby needed a bottle. I went back upstairs.

He brought baby back upstairs without feeding him, put him back in his crib. I brought baby back to him, said he needed to be fed.

Husband again threatened violence, then called the cops, accused me of provoking him to violence and of trying to make him do something that would work against him in a custody battle (I wasn't - I just wanted him to feed baby so I could sleep). Cops came. It was crazy. I can't believe he would do something that would possibly get our kids taken away from us.

He has been accusing me of manipulating him into doing something that would get him in trouble. He was very clear to the cops that he was the one to contact them, as if I were the wrongdoer in the situation, and very sure that he was extremely well-behaved in front of them. I have not yet contacted a lawyer. As I said, I've been trying to make this work. I just wanted him to feed baby a bottle so I could get a couple hours of sleep. But I think I'd better contact a lawyer now.

Any lawyer recommendations?
What else should I be doing? I'm in therapy. I've got some money. I have parents who can help.[/quote]

Oh I am so, so sorry for you. I dealt with someone like this. Please, please read this book immediately: Why Does He Do That? by Lundy Bancroft. Please read it. Get it on your kindle app or whatever e program you use (don't get a hard copy for obvious reasons). Please buy it right now and read it. Praying for you and baby. [/quote]

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