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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]You’re right, I do need to just stop helping and/or socializing in this context. Ugh. It’s really difficult and awkward to drive 2 hours to go ski, meet up with people who drove up separately, and have them saying “oops, we don’t have gloves” and not let them borrow the extra pair (which I keep for the afternoon once my son soaks his mittens in the morning) that they can literally see in the trunk. Once at the pumpkin patch I tried to not get involved with helping while the couple argued with each other about who packed what, told their kids they’d have to go home, kids were crying, etc. I finally dig up an old sweatshirt because the alternative seemed heartless.

And to the PP who mentioned her SIL, you just reminded me that mine does this, too. She’s less of a mystery: her excuse is that since she’s a doctor and helps other people, everyone else should help her. She’s so transparent about her rudeness that it doesn’t bug me in the same way![/quote]

It sounds like when they get stressed, you get very uncomfortable and immediately try to step in and fix it.

You need to stop.

When they’re yelling at the pumpkin patch your family needs to step away and let them handle it. Most places sell branded sweatshirts. Same for skii resorts. If they get up there with no gloves let them figure it out. They can buy anything they need at the resort. The markup is enormous, but again, not your problem. If you can’t handle stepping back, take a break from hanging out with them.

Oh yeah, it’s winter, ask for your kids gloves back!

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