Reply to Spinoff: Asking your SO to stop seeing a friend. What's your view?

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Reply to "Spinoff: Asking your SO to stop seeing a friend. What's your view?"

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[quote=Anonymous]Yes,  absolutely OK.  A rock solid marriage requires that the couple out their relationship first.  If it's a deal-breaker for one of them to ask the other to end a friendship with someone if the opposite sex,  thats a serious problem.

That said,  context is everything.  If there is a long pattern of one spouse being controlling and isolating the other spouse,  that's a different story.

I say this as someone who divorced after 17 tears of marriage.  My ex used to always talk about his admin assistant in neutral to slightly demeaning ways (not terribly bright,  unmotivated,  etc).  I cared naught for 6-7 years.  He started having to travel a lot...  Like 25% of the time,  and she usually accompanied.  He started talking about her way more often,  and in more glowing terms.  One night I looked him in the eye and said "whatever this is with your secretary,  you need to dial it back."  His response was that our marriage wouldn't work if he couldn't be friends with the secretary.

I kicked him out of the house right then and there.  No woman takes priority over me with my husband,  except maaaaaybe his mom.

They had a short lived affair before her husband turned him in and he was demoted and she was sent to a different department.  Shockingly cliche. [/quote]

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