Reply to what does it feel like to want to have kids?

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[quote=Anonymous]I've been pretty sure since I was in my teenage years that I didn't want children. I went through some years where I was open to it, if I were with a longterm partner who was really into it. But I married someone who wasn't interested in having children. We're 45 now. I could see us maybe fostering at some point, but if we don't that's ok too.

When I see the lengths people go to to have bio kids - the years of trying, IVF, the cost and emotional toll. It must be something you want *so badly* to go through all that.

What does that feel like, to want kids that badly? Is it like a physical urge? Is it something that takes over your whole mind, where it's hard to think about anything else?

I hope this isn't a trivial comparison, but it's as good as I've got: The closest I have to that is that I work in a creative field where every stage of success is very difficult to achieve. I have minor success in that field now - back when I was at the bottom rung, it felt like that was the only thing I cared about, was getting somewhere in that field. I wanted it so badly it hurt. (And now I am waiting to see if I will be moving up another rung - and I find myself in a constant state of stress and anxiety, waiting to hear if it'll be happening.)

Anyway, I know some people think that people without kids hate kids or don't care about the struggle to have them and the joys of raising them. I don't hate kids and I do care. I just don't relate. But I'd like to understand, if you want to share![/quote]

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