Reply to Husband being resentful about my forced furlough “vacation”

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]TBH I kind of resent my DH too.  He is working hard getting things done at home, but I would dearly love a paid vacation in which I get things done at home.  [/quote]

Not OP. Why on earth would you RESENT your spouse for something like this? I mean I get being jealous, or wishing it was you, but why be mad at them for something they have no control over? [/quote]

I think because he is doing projects that are more important to him than to me,[b] not picking up any of my usual chores to share the break[/b], and then in the evenings he wants me to make decisions and help him with project things, but I am tired from working all day.[/quote]

This would irritate me. Can you articulate that? Or, at least, articulate your last point - about not wanting to engage in project work since you've been working? My DH is furloughed, and while he still has to work about 8 hours a day anyway (from home), he picking up chores where he can to lighten my load - driving the kids, running errands, finishing house projects. [/quote]

I'm PP and this totally makes sense. This is the kind of thing that can feel like it makes no sense though if the spouse can't communicate what they're actually upset about.

Tell him this. And not aggressively just like, 'Hey you know I love that you're getting stuff done but I am fried at the end of the day. And to be honest I kind of wish that some of the stuff you were tackling were projects that had been on my list recently. It is hard to watch you make so much progress on your to-do list and know mine is stagnant and I won't have an opportunity like this to tackle it. I know this is all beyond your control but I'd really appreciate it if you could do XXX tomorrow if you have time. That would really help me out.'[/quote]

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