Reply to Still crying at age 11?

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Reply to "Still crying at age 11?"

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]My DD cries a lot over things that upset her. For example, just now, device time was ending and she was starting to unload the dishwasher. When I called up to her younger brother to get off his device, he asked if he could finish his game and I said OK. This provoked tears and sniffling in DD, who told me I was being unfair. She reacts this way to a lot of our parenting requests. Some reactions are more dramatic than others and are borderline tantrums. She's been like this for years, and I guess we assumed that she would outgrow it, but that does not seem to be happening. [b]SO my question is whether this is normal behavior for an 11 year old, and if not, what should we do about it?[/b][/quote]

This is going to sound basic but I mean it kindly … if you want to change the output then first you need to change the input.

As I'm sure you've seen so far as a parent, your children's behaviors really are precipitated by what they see/hear/feel from their parents.  If you want to change their behaviors then you change yours first.  So think about your interactions with your daughter prior to the tears and consider how a different tone/verbiage/timing/etc could change the outcome.

And, yes, some people (not just kids) are more emotive in general.  It sounds like your daughter may be in that category.  But if it is starting to get in her way of being healthy and productive, then perhaps you can help her change her habits of behavior by doing a little modification yourself first.  I'm not trying to put a huge burden on you; however, there is a habit of behavior in your daughter that is correlated to some external factor.  You can control one of those external factors.  Working with her on this may help her develop a new response to stimuli and once that new response becomes internalized she will apply it to a variety of life situations.

Just a thought.[/quote]

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