Reply to Grandparents, please stop undermining your kids' authority as parents

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Our 2 year old loves my parents and, in many ways, they are great grandparents. Problem is, they undermine our authority regularly. I get the whole "grandparents spoil kids" thing, but it's annoying when things like the following happen:

- DH is trying to enforce having DD either walk or sit in her stroller, and the grandparents just pick her up and carry her.

- We tell her she needs to sit at the table with us and eat her dinner, and the grandparents tell her she can eat 2 bites and then run around the living room, and then come back for another 2 bites, rinse and repeat.

These may not seem like big things, but they're things we're working on with her. Whenever my parents are around, she sees us as the mean disciplinarians and grandma and grandpa as the fun people who let her do whatever she wants, which is not a great dynamic.

Anyway, rant over. [/quote]
How often are you and the grandparents together?  If not often, just relax your rules while they are there.  If it's often, then undermine your parents. If grandparent says she can have 2 bites then run around, you say, firmly, No, sorry Suzy, grandma is incorrect, you need to stay in your seat, and then impose any consequence you otherwise would.  Let the grandparents do whatever they want (so long as it's safe) if kids are with them and you aren't there.

Also, stop caring about being seen as a mean disciplinarian.  If they don't ever think you're mean, you're doing your job wrong.  It's not a popularity contest.  It's fine for the grandparents to be seen as fun and doesn't take away from your kids' love for you.[/quote]

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