Reply to How do you make a super smart kid actually care about grades and school?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Boy age 13. Just does not see the purpose in school and does not care that he’s failing.  Completely impatient with it.  Incentives don’t work. Punishment doesn’t work.   He politely just refuses or doesn’t participate in school projects.  Yes I know there’s a group of people here who just say take away all electronics and punish him till he complies but that just doesn’t work for this kid.  Some depression going on but it’s medicated. He just doesn’t care about  School but continues to do very well on standardized testing but grades are nearly failing in all subjects.  Can’t imagine how this is going to play out when we move to high school next year.  It’s been a full year with this attitude so it’s not just a passing phase. And seems to be getting more entrenched. Any advice? [/quote]

Ugh. This is tough. I'm sorry you and your son are going through this. How is he socially? Does he have a group of friends he likes to hang with, or is he a loner? This sounds like a complex situation, so I can only offer the advice that comes to mind. What is the carrot and stick for him? What can you take away, and what can you offer as a reward? Personally, I think it's a consideration to hold him back next year. If you don't believe this is resulting from a medical issue, he does need to experience a consequence. That might be the one that works for him. If he continues to fail at everything in high school, he won't get into college anyway. I'd consider making him get a work permit at 14 also so he understands the purpose of getting an education and taking it serious. Perhaps look into ways to get him to truly understand the long-term consequence of opting out of education, which is what he's doing. Best of luck.[/quote]

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