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[quote=Anonymous]Change? Not really BUT (and there's a huge but) things are getting difficult. I spend all last year trying to get them to move closer, only to have them be totally resistant. They want to stay in their house but aren't really understanding of the fact that if my sister did not live with them, they would have been forced out by the state.

While my sister is excellent in some regards, she's also very much a child in others, and suffers from OCD that limits her ability to help with things like medical appointments, etc. My aunt (who is physically disabled) goes with my mother to appointments now as my mother doesn't always understand what she should/shouldn't do, or ignores the advice.

She's type 2 and eats a ton of sugar and now her legs are swollen, one to the point where she almost has to drag it and she gets sores on it. Her primary care finally sent her to a vein doctor and changed her medication. My father had a big stroke a couple years ago, but I'd say does better than my mother, especially physically. Getting in extra help is nearly impossible do to a dog that doesn't welcome strangers. My aunt has tried to work with him, and she gets called 'mean' by my mother and sister. She's by no means mean at all - she loves animals and is great with the dog, and he adores her.

If my mother goes first, my father and my sister will probably move east to our beach place, so that my sister can settle into the area for her own (later) retirement, and my father can have friends visit. My brother has essentially checked out by taking a job out West (3000 miles from his own three boys I might add) and while he says he'll go and help, it's not reliable.

All this said, I've learned that you can't do much until the state steps in if your folks are not cooperative. One too many falls, the one time a doctor recognizes a parent's inability to understand self-care anymore, etc. I'm planning on being there when I need to pick up the pieces, but all intervention was doing was making me stressed and hated.[/quote]

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