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[quote=Anonymous]We were grounded by in ancient past.   My sense is that the 21st century solution in the DMV is to take away electronics. Why is grounding a punishment when your kid can have a full and active social live from the privacy of her bedroom.

And yes, I take away iPhones. Usually because a kid has not done something they should.  If a kid doesn’t do a chore, doesn’t turn in a project (“I forgot,”), is making below a B, then more often then not, a part of the problem is they are distracted by the interweb rabbit hole.  Not having an iPhone is a constant reminder of what needs to be done.  And they are in control of getting it back. They just need to do whatever they “forgot” or “didn’t have time to do”. (And yet, 2 hours on FB Messenger).   It works well.

An aside on grades. My kids are very capable of Bs.  We have only had one time when a kid could not get a grade up to a B pretty quickly by turning in missing work or taking advantage of test corrections/retakes.   The time my kid was actually struggling academically with a class, they got a tutor, not an electronics ban.

When my kids screws up and punishment is called for, we usually don’t ground or take away electronics.   Instead, we try to get as close as we can to a logical consequence or making the situation right.  An easy (but dumb, I admit) example is if you are mean to a member of the family, you need to apologize and come up with something nice to make it up to the person you hurt.   Artistic DD might do a little I’m sorry doodle.  DS who gets up early will often make me a cup of coffee after my alarm goes off and bring it to me in bed.  10 minutes of something to impress on them that they hurt someone’s feelings.

I’m lucky that I have introverted little nerdlings, and we are not dealing with big things like alcohol, drugs, sneaking out, arrests. Knock on wood.  So right now, I am most worried that one of my kids will do something dumb and then not call us for help (e.g. go to a party with alcohol and not call for a safe ride or DD will not tell us she was assaulted).  
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