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[quote=Anonymous]Married 16 years, mid-40s, 2 late elementary kids. DH is a good person, has been a good husband and great dad. I’ve been dealing with a mental health issue - don’t want to get too specific, but think anxiety, that’s been particularly bad this year. I love DH and I like him and I know he loves me but he doesn’t understand the mental health issue and has been very frustrated with my inability to totally overcome it (I’ve made progress but it’s not total or without setbacks for various reasons)  doesn’t want to hear about it, wants me to be completely functional as if I don’t have the problem and had said some hurtful things at times - “you are being an a$$hole”, “do you need to be in a loony bin”, “you are f’ing crazy”

I get it. It’s really hard to live with someone who is a downer for months on end. I am on meds, have a psychiatrist, psychologist, read self-help books, exercise and started meditating so I AM trying. While this is going on I’m still doing what I need to do - work, taking care of kids, cooking all meals, home related tasks but it’s just been there in the background.

It’s gotten to the point where I feel like DH wants nothing to do with my issue - I have to appear to be totally “fine” in all interactions with him. So, I’m trying to do that but the upshot is that I feel pretty alone and it’s making me not want to engage with DH in any way other than practical daily stuff related to the house and kids. It’s like to protect myself I’m telling myself I need to think about my situation as if I’m not married.

I’m just not sure how to find our way back. I wish I didn’t have this problem but I do. I can’t imagine divorcing - my children would be devastated - but I feel like DH and I are kind of emotionally disconnected. Any advice? [/quote]

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