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[quote=Anonymous]I'm can't believe I'm admitting this to anyone but it's gotten to the point that I need some perspective.

I'm mid-40s, fairly happily married, fairly normal sex life. Kids can drive now and are not around as much. So, around the 4th, we are at an adult neighborhood party. It's a fairly large party with maybe 30-40 couples from the neighborhood and another 20-25 from outside the neighborhood. DH and I often go our separate ways at parties and check in periodically. So I'm on my way back from the restroom and I stop at the bar to refill my wine. As a turn to head back toward a group of friends, I almost bump directly into a guy that lives a couple blocks away and that I would see running in the neighborhood occasionally. Let's call him Greg. I am pretty sure Greg is still married without kids. Had I been pressed to introduce him at that time, I wouldn't have been totally confident in his name. Anyway, as we almost bump, he's smiling at me and does not divert his eyes a bit. As I say whoops, I hear what I think is him say "I'll show you mine if you show me yours." As you might imagine, that line caught me off guard. It was so strange that I didn't say or do anything as I tried to process if I heard him correctly. After about 10 steps, I turned back to look and he was just standing there, with his drink, looking at me with a goofy smile. As he sees me, he raises his glass. I headed back to some people I knew and I debated mentioning it but thought it was so strange that I might not be believed and there were a couple people there I wasn't close with. I also thought about finding my husband but I was afraid of a scene. I was pretty distracted and disturbed the rest of the night. I only saw the guy once more that evening and it was at a distance. We did catch eyes and he gave me a sideways nod toward the house, as if reinforcing that it was what he said. I'm unsure if his wife was even at the party and I'm not certain they are still married.

I thought about saying something when I got home but just decided it would cause more trouble than it was worth. I was thinking maybe the guys was just drunk and thought he was being funny. I also knew we don't really have contact, so I just let it go. I also thought that if it was common behavior, I would have heard by now as I have a few friends that don't miss anything that goes on in the neighborhood and can't help but talk about it.

So fast forward to the next week at work, I find myself thinking about the incident more and more. I'm wondering if he meant it and if he was actually interested, not because I'm interested in having an affair but more just curiosity or maybe ego. It then progresses over time to thoughts or daydreams of flashing him and imagining what he looks like or him following me into the bathroom. This past week, I've found myself driving into the neighborhood in a way I didn't used to. This new pattern takes me past his street. I have seen him a couple times since running and he smiles and waves, like a perfectly normal neighbor. The last 2 times, I did try to steal a quick glance to see if I missed an opportunity (nothing noticeable at a glance). Last night, I had a dream about him.

So, am I losing it? Do I need to see someone? I mean something that repulsed me (or so I thought) a little over a month ago now has me blushing, fantasizing and acting strangely. Is this just a normal case of someone starved for a little attention after 20 years of marriage that will pass in a week or 3 or is it something I need to worry about?

For those that will ask, I have no desire to act on these thoughts, though DH might have benefitted a couple times and I can't imagine ever cheating.[/quote]

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