Reply to Need a check on my anger - SIL drops by when I said it wasn't a good time

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[quote=Anonymous]Here's the situation.  My kid's birthday party was this past weekend.  My SIL couldn't make the party.  But she texts me the night before asking if she and her Dh could drop off their birthday gift to us at 8 am the morning of the party.  I respond that that morning will be crazy busy and it's just too early for us but maybe another day.  She doesn't respond.

The day of the party, we are running around prepping for the party.  At 8:30 my kid runs up and tells us that his aunt dropped off a birthday gift and proceeds for the next hour or two begging us to put it together.  I am annoyed as F.  Not only are we running around prepping for the party, but we have our kid begging us to put the toy together.  So, we're either taking time out to explain that we can't put it together until after the party, or we're taking time out to put the damn thing together.

So, on the one hand, I'm not supposed to be mad because my kid got a birthday gift.  OTOH, why text and ask if you could drop off a gift only to ignore my response and do it anyway?

I want to give her the benefit of the doubt and assume she thought my "no" meant that we wouldn't have time to stop and visit with them before they left town so instead she drove up, saw our kids playing in the front yard, gave the gift and drove away without "bothering" us.  But the text was written in such a way that already made it clear they weren't planning to stay for a visit before leaving town.  It was clearly a "drop the gift off on our way out" kind of thing.

By the way, they live about 7 minutes away so it's not like it's a long haul to come another day to drop the gift off.  In fact, they visited us the next day when they came back to town.

I'm mad.  I'm mad because this isn't the first time SIL has done whatever she wanted to without thinking about others.  But I want a reality check that I'm not overreacting because of her history with this kind of thing.

Oh, and if you all think it was rude/selfish or whatever, should I say something to her?  If I should, what should I say?[/quote]

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