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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Repeat this mantra: "I did not cause this. I can't cure it. I can't control it."

Of course it is upsetting, however. Use good self care and therapy, if needed, to manage the stress that this puts on you. You might also find the forum at outofthefog.net helpful; it's a site where the loved ones of personality disordered individuals support each other. Stories like yours are fairly common there.

You can try to help your mother prioritize just one thing she will do to take care of herself. See if she will make the first medical appointment and follow through. The excuses are exactly that, excuses. While she is mentally ill, she is certainly aware enough to understand the consequences of her actions, though we all know that she will blame others for those consequences, regardless.

Medical providers often contact family members for help. In typical families this isn't unreasonable. In families with personality disorders, it's complicated. You can't [i]make[/i] your mom do anything. You can offer sympathy to the doctors that you understand their frustration, and you can also set a boundary for yourself that you can only get involved at a certain level.  [/quote]

Thanks for this. [/quote]

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