Reply to Rude to ask if someone is a boy or a girl?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]With an adult, I would ask them what pronoun they prefer.  That's a perfectly appropriate question--you should call people what they like to be called, so if you're not sure, ask them what they would like to be called.

If your son was better friends with this kid, then it would probably be okay to ask the kid about his/her gender presentation.  But since he doesn't know this kid well, asking [b]"Are you a boy or a girl" is a bit rude.[/b]  [/quote]

It is rude, but I've heard this question more than once when people are looking at my kids. My oldest looked like a beautiful girl when he was a baby/toddler. I would dress him in all blue with a baseball hat and people were still unsure and felt the need to ask for some reason. My youngest boy has long (below the ear/almost shoulder length) curly hair. He likes it long and I think short hair accents his oval face too much. He was dressed "like a boy" when someone recently told him that they couldn't tell what he was and proceeded to ask him. DS was horrified by this.
Op, I wouldn't bring up gender identification until your is a little older and able to better grasp the complexities of the situation. I also think that your son should just use his friend's name and not worry about whether its a girl or a boy. This will likely be hard for him because we are all used to putting people into neat categories; male/female, black/white, etc. and that's what we teach our kids.[/quote]

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