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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP had this same situation come up in my friend group. One friend went down the non profit road, rest of us stayed in biglaw or in house. Those of us in biglaw and in house aren't doing anything over the top - we're not jetting off to Monaco like you say. But compared to the friend making non profit money, even our "regular" things are a lot -- even though we don't discuss specifics. After a while we noticed that friend started to act a lot like yours -- almost acting insecure about her choice to go into a job making 100k or less and then going on about how it was so important to serve the world (the implication being, that we were lesser humans for taking care of ourselves first).

Reality is no one wants to be backhandedly criticized for the way they live. She wouldn't stand for it if you said -- OMG why can't you just go buy a new suit. Well then you don't have to stand for it when she constantly tells you everything you like is dumb.

Our group is still friends with that friend but it's cooled significantly because no one wants to be judged all the time.[/quote]

Oh, a group of biglaw assholes!  How unique!  Hahahaha.

You are being super defensive.  You guys brag about your big luxuries, she says she prefers her nonprofit goal, you feel judged and drop her.  Well, she is right.

At least we know how you roll.  It is OK but you need to own it and not feel insecure.[/quote]

Think what you want but LOL at a 700k shit shack or going to the Outer Banks being a BIG luxury. I'm not defensive about it. I like OP have the view -- very openly -- that I need to take care of me and my family first. If others want to sacrifice $$ to serve others, God bless them, but it isn't for me right now until I feel totally financially secure. As for judging -- she's the one telling us everything we say or do is dumb; we have never said that to her -- if she wants to serve, that's great, we don't sit there and criticize her.[/quote]

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