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[quote=Anonymous]My wife and I have for years discussed her eventually leaving the traditional workforce or going part-time--but we're not completely on the same page, and so our decision-making has been slow and fraught.

I'm interested in advice and experience from people who have worked through this kind of situation.

Some basics about us:

*I make a bit more than 3X wife, who makes about 100K. 
*Two preschool-aged children. 1 more year of private preschool for eldest, 2-3 more for youngest. 
*Mortgage is approx. 4K a month. 
*We save a lot: about 9K a month with combined retirement, 529s, and brokerage. Still, even with current savings rate, it would take 15+ more years to generate enough to maintain our current lifestyle in retirement. 
*My job is stable, and income has gone up by about 5-10 percent a year last three years. But it's client-service, intense, and I'm near the top of the market (as a wage-earner). Would be hard to replace this income should something happen to firm/market. 
*Wife is a former biglaw attorney now at a nonprofit. 
*I am early 40s; she's mid 30s.

Some other considerations:

*My preference has been for her to wait until we have more breathing room (kids firmly in public and no signals they'll need private; sufficient savings to pay off mortgage should we need; my future income rises to equal our current combined income, etc.), but it looks like she's increasingly unhappy and anxious to make this move. (The happiness of our marriage is implicated by this decision, is what I'm saying. The stakes are high for getting it right!)

*I am prone to anxiety about money and am risk-averse, so will probably never feel "comfortable" with a single-income household. But the truth is we have lots of cushions to weather any emergencies.

*I don't think her working less or not at all will create major savings for us. We'll still do full-day, year-round preschool, as well as cleaning/yard services.

*I, too, have fantasies about leaving/reducing the work, and this kind of move would kill that dream, but I'm much happier at work than she is.

We've never sought advice from a financial planner, but maybe this is the right time to do so? [/quote]

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