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[quote=Anonymous]OP, I'd give your SIL a chance to "save face" AND let her know that this won't fly at the same time.

Call her up and say "Oh Larla, I'm soooooo sorry about our misunderstanding. I think we got our wires crossed, and somehow I was thinking that you were asking if you could drop your kids off with our nanny and she would just watching them for free while you ran errands. So when I explained to BIL that we can't just add extra kids to our nanny's responsibility without her being compensated, he was sure that I had misunderstood. So if you guys are willing to pay her to watch your kids while you do various errands, I'd be happy to ask her if she might be wiling to do this and what she would charge you. Or if you wanted me to see if she might be interested in doing playdates where you'll be here at the same time or meet at a park so the kids can play together, I can always ask!"

Then see how she responds. This lets her "save face" and gives her another shot at not looking like a total mooch! OR, she can double down and actually have to clarify that she is ASKING for FREE babysitting from your nanny...to which you can again emphasize, "I'm sorry....but we pay her to watch Larlo, and I can't ask her to add additional kids without you compensating her for that."
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