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[quote=Anonymous]OP, I'm glad your marriage is working well, but please get a new therapist and maybe get more intense therapy because your focus on your family could end up, over time, undermining your marriage. What your family did was awful and you clearly feel extremely rejected, understandably so. And DCUM will tell you, "Good riddance, just cut them out." But your own mind won't let go of brooding on this, so whether you want to cut them out of your life or want to try to restore a relationship later -- you need to work on what's inside YOUR head right now not what is or was inside theirs. You can't control other people, you can only control your reactions to them, but the fact that this still looms so large for you means you don't have that control yet. And you can see that, which is a huge help in getting started.

From your posts it's clear that there is MUCH more to your family story and probably to your upbringing in a household where dad cheated, maybe mom cheated, and everyone is so very...angry. That didn't first show itself at the time of your wedding, I'm pretty sure. Please work through it with a professional ASAP and don't stop therapy when you "feel better" but keep going to ensure you develop the skills and tools in yourself to move on with your own life.

Don't try to contact them right now (but also don't do anything dramatic like announce to them that you'll never contact them ever again etc.). Just go quiet, and if they contact you, be civil and respond civilly but never respond to mean or abusive contact from them. I would be too busy to see them for a long while to come. While in this mostly silent phase, get help.

Double down on time with your husband and being a happy couple. Do things together, get out and make sure you are doing things with friends both with DH and on your own. Advance your friendships by getting involved in other aspects of life--volunteering (that'll give you perspective on how wedding drama is nothing next to what some people endure in life), pursuing hobbies, finding new ones....all while getting therapy with a better therapist. [/quote]

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