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[quote=Anonymous]I hear you OP. My mom is like this. It hurts all the more because my MIL passed away and she was such a thoughtful person.

My mom insisted that she was coming to help for a month when my first child was born. When I brought up the idea of hiring a post partum doula she balked saying that sounded like something for people who didn’t have a mother. We planned all visits around hers and DH waited to take time off until after she planned to leave.

You can guess where this is going? Right before my due date she announced she wasn’t coming for a month after all. Too stressful. She was only going to come for 2 days. That first month was incredibly difficult because DH couldn’t take any Paternity leave and I was having pretty serious health issues. It was horrible.

I learned my lesson though. Never again. I trust my friends more than I trust my parents in terms of reliability. I also make zero effort to see them now. If they want to see us, they can come visit. I also never tell the kids they’re coming until their cab is in the driveway. They’re my parents otherwise I would have cut them out of my life completely. [/quote]

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