Reply to What do you do with your ADHD defiant preschool kids? Daycare, nanny, or SAH

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]If there is a speech delay, I would be very hesitant to define a young child as "defiant".  Children at that age, who can't express themself verbally often become inappropriately physical. I say inappropriate, because for other same age peers the appropriate expectation would be to be able to say "No" or "I don't like that" or lgice that back" or "stop bothering me".  A speech delayed child can't perform the age-appropriate speech to resolve conflict verbally, so they are still dealing with it physically like a younger child would.

Your child needs help with this.  A lot of explicit modeling.  More careful monitoring and an adult who is ready to step in and redirect away from conflict or act as conflict mediator/model.  I would literally have to step in on playdates with my ADHD kid and explain, model and mediate conflict.

The impulsivity of aDHD may also make it difficult to pause before physical responses.

Impulsivity and inability to verbally negotiate conflict are NOT the same as "defiance" (which is pretty pejorative).[/quote]

I agree but his current daycare is not accommodating so I am looking at different solutions.  The problem is I need to take into account what to do with our younger child.  We are still awaiting an official diagnosis at Children's Autism Center in one months.  His child developmental pediatrician suspects high functioning autism and ADHD.  His OT therapist believes there are issues with sensory processing and motor coordination.[/quote]

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