Reply to Question about marriages of 20+ years that end

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]The person who leaves does fine... They almost always, always leave because they want to have sex with someone else.  If things work out with that person, they don't give their spouse a second thought.

My marriage ended after 17 years, but we were together about 3 years before getting married. I'm not gonna lie, it was devastating.  I had to just completely cut off all contact, except for what was absolutely necessary for the kids.  He is basically dead to me, and honestly, my husband really is gone... This madoesnt even resemble my husband.  sometimes I do miss my husband terribly, but he's gone.  I almost wonder if he was ever really who I thought he was.

In his case, his affair partner went back to her husband.  I have no idea what my ex thinks or feels.  I can tell you he looks terrible, has gained at least 40 lbs, and looks generally unkempt. [/quote]

+1 but the other way around. My wife left me for the neighbor. My kids have a hard time trying to have a relationship with her. [/quote]

A very good friend of mine's wife left him for a neighbor - a female. He was dumbstruck given they had a pretty good marriage and still had an active sex life though she had been depressed for a few years. He and his HS age kids were devastated. His ex moved out of the area and has very little contact with the children. It's been almost three years and he is rebuilding his life. It took him awhile to realize there wasn't much he could have done. [/quote]

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