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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I need different perspectives.

Been with my wife 13 years and we have 2 kids togetherHowever, I recently found out about her sexual past which we agreed to not really talk about but had details flushed out a bit clearer.  And it's disturbed me.  We have a decent sexual relationship in terms of frequency and action but not adventurous or particularly open.  She's a bit reserved and made me "wait" when we first met (I actually thought about leaving her initially because I questioned why she would purposely block intimacy without an explanation and made me question what might be wrong).  Most disturbing is that she had a one-night fling with a friend (despite her sexually reserved attitude with me when we first met) and other stories indicate a more free/adventurous sexual past.  I remember meeting her one night fling and am really annoyed having hung around him and her together without being the wiser.  It really bothers me...makes me feel kind of cucky/dopey/foolish?

Second to that, she seemed far more sexual with the men in her past.  I feel she lost her virginity a bit young IMO and her number was surprisingly high (if you were to guess based on her personality and lifestory, I don't think you'd get it right) and did some mildly slutty things when that the person I know really wouldn't do.  I was a late bloomer that had sex with 2 different women 4 times prior to her keeping in mind I met her at 22.  Nobody knows this and nobody would believe it given my personality and looks.  I'm kind of jealous and shocked of her past even though it would likely be pretty tame considering most of the stories I hear.

Thoughts?

I wouldn't worry about it, unless you are upset she isn't doing with you what she did with the others.  Then bring it up but NOT in relation to knowing she did that stuff in the past, that won't end up well.  Its pretty common, women are slutty  when they are young and are looking for fun.  Once they rope a guy into marriage, no need for that anymore.  You should be happy that at least you have some sort of sex life in your marriage, many people don't :)

As for feeling dopey etc, don't, she was a totally different person when you were not in her life, so no reason to feel that you had anything to do with how she was before you.  Also be happy that she isn't a train wreck, most of the women I had crazy sex with in the past were massively damaged so it sounds like you ended up ok if she is overall a decent wife.
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