Reply to I love my husband, but I don't like him

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]You tell him that he's changed into a negative, toxic presence and that you intend to live a happy, optimistic life and that he needs to think about what you're saying and get some help  adjusting his perspective or you're done. Is he physically healthy? I find that disgruntled, middle-aged men (he's white I'm guessing) are usually out of shape, couch potatoes who have a lot of self-loathing and feel they've been cheated out of their success. Sound familiar, OP? [/quote] Yes, 52 year old white couch potato. I run, bike, go to the gym. He has a gym membership, I ask him to come along with me every single time, he's come with me 3 times and it was to use the hydro massager and not work out. He is negative "the world is against him" but it shows mostly when there are little things around the house that go wrong, or even if I talk about painting a room and I am fully planning on doing it myself, but he seems to think that I'm putting this chore on him, even when I say I'M DOING IT. I do all the yardwork (I like to do it, but he only complains about it anyways so I've just taken it over). He leaves dishes in the sink, I've stopped asking him to rinse and put in the dishwasher, I just do it now vs here his complaints. I told him to use paper plates if he doesn't want to rinse his dish. Our 2 kids are more responsible around the house than he is.  It is just trying on my nerves. I'm a VERY upbeat positive person. I avoid negative people and always think on the bright side, give the other person slack because you don't know what people are going through at home or work. But I am at my limit of living with it everyday. We went on an all inclusive vacation to the Caribbean the week after Christmas.  He found something to complain about the entire time: Too many people in the pool, service takes too long, not enough dinner choices, how long does it take to make a drink, the towels are too scratchy (I'm not making this up!!). It really pushed me over the last month to where I'm at. I can't take it anymore. I actually avoid being home now unless my kids are there.

I have tried a sit down with him over the years. He even said to me once "well, why are you so happy!?"

Ugh, sorry to vent, but it really is that bad  :cry: [/quote]

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