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Reply to "Obsessive rumination over bad relationship with my mother"
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[quote=Anonymous]You need to create firm boundaries. Do not tell her about date nights. Do not count on her to babysit. Do not tell her about trips or vacations. Treat her like a distant relative. Boundaries, boundaries, boundaries. "That won't work for us." Why? "It just won't. But we can ______." Do not EVER give reasons why you are saying no. Mourn what you wish you had - a mother who would sew cute things for your kids and bake cookies with them. Then let go of it. You may have to mourn it more than once. That's okay. [/quote]
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