Reply to I lost my daughter to her controlling BF and now I am losing my house

Forum Index » Family Relationships

Reply to "I lost my daughter to her controlling BF and now I am losing my house"

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous]I almost lost her when she was 2 years old and she fell off my balcony resulting in a traumatic brain injury , thankfully she recovered and our lawyer got us a large settlement as it was the fault of my management plus the construction company, that money was used to buy us a house and car and we placed the rest in a trust fund for her future, fast forward to her becoming a teen, she started being interested in boys and got involved with some bad boys that broke her heart , next thing I know she is cutting herself in secret, I did not find out till I saw the cuts on her myself, then she starts running away occasionally we could never figure out why, we loved her , hardly if ever argued and were not controlling we just asked that she tell us where she was going and be back at a decent time, she started not wanting to attend school anymore and acted like we were the worst parents for waking her up and making her attend school , towards the end of her senior year though she became motivated to graduate and get a job to be independent we fully supported this.

Then this boy she was hanging out with that liked her started texting her constantly , showing up uninvited at our house and basically stalking her I saw this as a red flag that this boy was no good but she saw it as he loves her, next thing I know they are a couple and they started spending all their time together, she went over to his house for dinner 2 nights before she was due to graduate and it got late so my husband texts her asking her to come home and we were told to f off that she will do what she wants as she is 18 now and next thing I know she is saying she is moving in with him and she felt like we don't love her and she felt safer with him and said all sorts of other abusive things to me, the next day we were at the store and ran into her with his family and we asked her if she would come home so she can graduate and she said yes  without hesitation and when we got home she said she was sorry for saying she thought we did not love her and being rude, she told us that when she told his family that she should come home they yelled at her asking " but don't you want a better life"  we tried to explain to her that the boyfriend and his family trying to make her run away and skip graduation was not normal, sounded toxic to us but she continued seeing him and she graduated ,then we went away on a 4th of July vacation to the beach where she was away from him for 3 days and this was a big issue for the boyfriend.

Next thing we know she comes home telling us she is pregnant and moving in with the boyfriend, we handled it as calmly as possible and told her we thought it was best for her to stay here so we can make sure she gets prenatal care, she agreed then was going out to his mothers car to get her things 20 minutes later she walks in with nothing and is completely shut down wont talk, then she says abusive things to me , saying no she wont say here she hates it here and runs out the door crying, ever since then she go's back and forth from acting like she wants us in her life to she does not want us in her life, I suspect the boyfriend is telling her to have nothing to do with us but there was only once that she admitted he threw a fit when she wanted to come home to visit,  he insisted on being with her 24-7 just this year he started allowing her to come with us alone but she does not stay long and wont tell us how things are going, when the baby was born I was not allowed at the hospital till later that evening, they go to see his family all the time at least twice a week but we never get to see her or the baby. She also pushed away all of her friends and she says she is sorry all the time for everything, things that are not even her fault.

Now the trustee is selling the house out from under us as its not benefiting her anymore , he claims she came in there just before Christmas telling him to sell it but she never said anything to us and now she wont even speak to us, we don't know where we went wrong, we don't insult the boyfriend or the relationship as we saw in the beginning that just makes her defend him and pushes her away, an entire month went by where they boyfriend would not let her talk to us because he was mad at us for saying he needs professional help, ever since I have been nothing but caring and supportive for them and the baby but it seems she believes we don't care about her and she posted on facebook last week under their family photo together that she is so happy to have a family that loves her now. I told her we love you we always have and always will and got no response. Then I messaged her asking if she can come over for dinner and got no response. Finding out were losing the house was a shock but we will move on and be okay but feeling like I have lost my daughter is the most painful part. I don't know what to do anymore and people around me are tired of my talking about it so thats why I am venting here and any advise is welcome. Thank you [/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics