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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I'm not exactly sure what you are asking.

[b]Setting boundaries means YOUR BEHAVIOR.  What you will and won't do.  It doesn't mean that you tell them they can't drink in front of your kids or that the kids are "confused" about the age difference.  Kids are confused about a lot of things -- disability, gay marriage, Donald Trump.  It doesn't mean that we avoid (or can avoid) those things just to make life unconfusing for them.  
[/b]
This really just sounds like "I don't want to see my sister because she's able to live a functional life and get married and dammit, I was hoping she would be in a gutter by now."[/quote]

+1  Nailed it.  I never understand why people who say that they are "setting boundaries" don't understand that this DOES NOT mean that they can try to exert their control over another person.  [/quote]

To clarify, I was talking about my own behavior (when and how I visit her)- I learned a long time ago I can’t control hers.[/quote]

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