Reply to Should guests dictate when they will come for the holidays (or ever)?

Forum Index » Family Relationships

Reply to "Should guests dictate when they will come for the holidays (or ever)?"

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous]So my family celebrates Christmas twice (Dec. 25) and Jan. 7 (Eastern Orthodox).

My brother has informed me that he can’t come on for Christmas (Jan. 7) because he has a Monday morning meeting. But he is taking two weeks off before that.

He called me and told me he can’t come for Christmas due to his Monday meeting and he already took two weeks off for vacation. He said he wants to come on January 2 and leave Saturday morning (he lives 8 hours away).

I told him that we don’t want him coming on Jan. 2 and leaving right before Christmas on Saturday. The reason is because we are getting back from a huge drive ourselves on Jan. 1, and school starts on Jan. 2 for my 6-year-old. She would be extremely upset if she had to go to school and only see my brother and his family after school in the evenings and then have them leave on her day off from school [on Saturday--Christmas Eve). She would be crying on these days. I think it is unfair to put her through that to accommodate my brother’s request (it is really that he will be 3.5 hours from us and prefers to drive here than drive home and then fly here).

I don’t think it is unreasonable to say “just come another time, come on a weekend or a school vacation.” And that is what I told him. I also told him he could come down the following long weekend. Or he could still come, but come Jan. 4 and leave on Sunday instead of Saturday.  I also gave him a list of long weekend and the school vacation schedule.

What does he do? Sends me a nasty email ignoring my request and asking again to come on Jan. 2. Then he calls my dad, who then gets into an argument with me than I just should let him come whenever he wants and it does not matter than my daughter would be upset that she can’t spend much time with him and that he is leaving on her day off and before Christmas for us. (I also have a younger daughter in preschool but that is less of my concern.)

I don’t think I am wrong here to say that we would love for you to come, but we need you to come on a long weekend, not in the beginning of a week when we are getting back from a long trip ourselves and we are back in school. That is what I said and my brother is irate. 
Who is wrong here? Me or him?
[/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics