Reply to Help me with my totally messed up marriage, in which the abuser blames the abused

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP - are you SURE he's not developed a drug habit - including steroids or other enhancers?  When I was in college, we could always tell when members of the football team started using because otherwise pleasant guys would almost over-night start acting out and became aggressive, even off the field.

You may want to google signs to look for - it can be right under your nose and you wouldn't know it.  If he's taking anything he says "is just a supplement" - check it out.

Whatever the cause, I'm glad you're reaching out - it's a lonely place to be and at the very least you want to be understood and validated.  I get it.
[/quote]

I meant to add alcohol to this list.  Do you know how many "functional" alcoholics there are?  They are often good at their jobs - one of the best in the field  - but at home it's a different story.  And if he's charming in public, it's much harder on you.  I know somebody who is well respected in his field, has a life-long drinking problem and is very good at hiding it.  At home, if he needs a drink or has crossed the line to "one too many" it's as if a light has been switched out of no where.  A drinking problem - or drug problem - is a PROBLEM whether the person is falling down, passed out or a "simply" causing a relationship to decay - there are many reckless, destructive addicts who aren't "obvious" or text book ... and they're the ones that can cause the most trouble for their loved-ones.[/quote]

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