Reply to What would you do? 20 yo almost 21 yo cousin wants to live with us?

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[quote=Anonymous]Tough one OP.  Not with my minor children, especially if it has ended badly in the past! And there could be drugs in the mid. But I would not want a relative living on the streets either.  And it sounds like this is where your nephew is headed.

So I guess that your best option may be to help him find safe, affordable housing, and get himself back on his feet. If he is just out of rehab, maybe a halfway house is the next step?  They should be able to help him get hooked up with social services, hold NA meeting, etc..  And once he gets settled and has been sober a while, encourage him to go to a community college part time and get a marketable skill.

Also, I would not let him take your kids on an outing until he has been sober for a while. But, still makes sure he feels like a member of the family, and invite him over to your house for dinner, or out for dinner, or on family day trips, and make sure he has someplace to go for holiday meals, and that you make a birthday cake, and celebrate, etc.

So be supportive family—absolutely. It sounds like he needs it. Have him live with you?  I wouln’t— at least not when he is just out of rehab. [/quote]

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