Reply to Allowing adult son to move back in? What is fair?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Are you sure you're not overestimating how easy it is to get a job in his field? Jobs are not exactly falling off the tree for 23-year-olds with a bachelors degree and no real experience. You're sounding like you think you own him because you paid for his college education.

However, he's 23 and been living on his own.  A curfew is a non-starter.  Respect for the occupants of the house (not making a huge noise, no parties without consulting with you etc, no extreme messes) is fair request.[/quote]

+1. If he were 27 my answer would be different, but plenty of people live with their parents (for free, I might add) at 23 to save money. You sound kind of disgusted toward him - is there something else going on? I’m not saying coddle him, but the examples you gave of buying a cheap car, going on a family vacation (?) etc don’t seem like he’s living an extravagant lifestyle to begin with. If your biggest issue is that he hasn’t gotten a job in his field, well it’s harder than you think nowadays.

I just don’t get this attitude, sorry. My parents did everything they could to set me up for success at that age and since you live in a wealthy upper NW neighborhood it doesn’t sound like this is a money thing. [/quote]

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