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[quote=Anonymous]I am in the same boat.  When we got married we were both extremely fit and the fire was H.O.T.  Well, fast forward 10 years later with kids/careers/money strain...and I am still very fit, but he has let it go. I am not saying that to pat myself on the back.  I had to really work at it after the kids but I wanted him to have some semblance of the woman he married.  Well, he doesn't seem to feel that way at all.  And, I know it sounds so surface, but I am honestly NOT attracted to him at all. I don't even know if it is that he is soft and overweight, or if it is his complete lack of drive to better himself.  But, whatever it is, likely a bit of both, I just don't want to touch him, or for him to touch me.

Whenever I bring it up to him in the softest way I can, he gets VERY defensive and shuts me down.  So what do we do, just suck it up?  I can't do that.  I feel like my sex drive is in hyperspace, and his is barely pulsing.  Everyone says, be honest...communicate...but what if he just won't hear it?

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