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[quote=Anonymous]Totally depends.  I was in what I thought was a happy marriage, and when I found out my husband was cheating I seriously could not have been more shocked.  Married 15+ years, almost never fight.  Our kids are elementary age, so sex wasn't what it was (maybe 1-2 times a week at most).

We've been separated for a year and should be signing the divorce papers any day now.  It was terrifying for me... I spent most of my adult life as a "we" so doing it on my own was scary.  But....  I learned i could, and I could do so easily.

I was worried about our kids, we did have to get them in to counseling, but they are adjusting well.  It's not ideal, but my ex and I don't badmouth each other and they don't know about his affair (yet... if he ever introduces her to them, I will probably tell them who she is, eventually, when they ar old enough to process it).

Money is tighter.  Holidays are complicated and lonely.

Dating was terrifying but oh so much fun!

I didn't realize how much of my personality I had more or less suppressed to be a "we" and I've really, really enjoyed unleashing a totally pure and unrestrained version of ME.

Would I do it again??  I don't know.  I know that our marriage was over, and I could never get past his infedelity and lies.  But I don't love this for our kids.  I'd have stuck it out until the kids were a bit older...  we weren't fighting, we weren't mean to each other, we were quite loving and healthy, honestly.

But I like where I am.  I like who I am.  I like this version of me better.  [/quote]

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