Reply to Calling all Introverts - Help me connect with my DH and DS (introverts)

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Reply to "Calling all Introverts - Help me connect with my DH and DS (introverts)"

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[quote=Anonymous]I am an extrovert by nature.  For example, I get energized by people and I like talking my problems out.

My DH is an introvert and we connected over the opposites attract theory.  While we have, for the most part, a normal marriage, there are some very real differences.  For example, when we get into an argument, I like to get everything out there and talk things out.  DH does not.  Initially, I thought it was because he could not articulate his feelings.  But it turns out introverts contemplate things internally before sharing them.  He does not like being put on the spot to explain his side of the argument when he has not had a chance to turn the issue over in his head (he calls it processing time).  This takes time and is something that I've learned to accept.

I see my DS growing up and notice many of the same traits.  When conflict arises, my DS withdraws and doesn't want to talk about it.  Initially, I thought it was because he was a boy and shy.  But as I learn more about the differences between extroverts and introverts, I can see him being like my DH, an introvert.

I realize that I need to get better at connecting with my DH and DS and I don't have the slightest clue on how to do that.  They aren't into touchy feely expressions of love so I wanted to poll some introverts to understand your frame of mind better to see if you have any suggestions for me.

If you are an introvert, I have some questions:

1) When did you realize that you were an introvert?  How does being an introvert affect your relationships?
2) For those introverts that are married to extroverts, how have you found a good way to work through arguments?  Do you ask for time to process before engaging in conversation?  Do your spouses tire you out with conversation?
3) If you were a son or daughter of extroverted parents, what is the best way your parents connected with you?  When did you feel understood the most?  When did you feel loved the most?

Thank you in advance for any suggestions.  I am just now understanding that there are very large differences between extroverts and introverts and I'm trying to learn how to bridge those gaps and build a better relationship with my DH and DS.[/quote]

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