Reply to Was anyone able to save their marriage after it was pretty much over?

Forum Index » Relationship Discussion (non-explicit)

Reply to "Was anyone able to save their marriage after it was pretty much over?"

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]It kinda sounds like there wasn't anything there to begin with, so it's unclear what there might be to salvage.

My marriage went to the brink and we came back from it (infidelity on his part).  But it was a long hard slog and we both wanted it.  Went on to have a second child and have a reasonably strong marriage now (10 years later), but it's still hard.

It sounds like you barely like this person.  You just might want to salvage something so you can have more kids?  I can understand that.  But I just don't see how this marriage is going to lead to a happy family life.

But say you do want to give it one honest try, to see if there is anything there.  Therapy.  Even alone if he won't do marriage therapy.  And then you have to let go a little bit - stop fighting.  Let go of resentment.  Just let it go.  I'm not saying be a doormat - just disengage from fighting over everything and bringing in past grievances to current situations.  (Hard to do).  See if you can find even a kernel of goodwill to this person you married.  Schedule a weekly date night.  Force yourself to interact positively, and lessen the negative interactions.

And look - as you're going through a process of disengagement over resentments and disagreements, you'e also strengthening yourself if the final answer is leaving.  [/quote]

Thank you, this is really helpful. I've made an appointment to meet with a therapist this week. [/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics