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[quote=Anonymous]Op,

I am so sorry!  Yes, I would stop trying for right now.  Don't think long term as things could change.   If you can afford it I would go to a good therapist and work on yourself.  It sounds like your family is enmeshed ( I know I also grew up in one) If you had normal healthy relationship than your brother would have had a conversation with you and heard your side.  As it is, your mom talking bad about you to brother isn't cool.  She should have kept whatever disagreement with you just between you.

I am one of three and my sister also left the family although in our case the whole family ( mom, brother and I)  I cannot stress how therapy has really helped me.  I can't give you a long term answer but, perhaps talking to someone will give clarity to the situation.  None of us has met our nephew, sister's choice.  Sad for this little boy because we would love to shower him with love.  Nothing we can do so I try not to think about it.

You are not alone, though.

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